Auditions

Today I had my audition for the mainstage play. The auditions were amusing because I almost the only experienced person there, and everybody else was so nervous and it was funny. When people do auditions they do funny things, like lift their legs in the air. And that last thing could totally be interpreted as a sexual reference, shutup Kolyn's stupid male brain that turns everything into a sexual innuendo. But anyway. It was really funny seeing all of the auditioneers doing their things because most of them were doing their bloody isms. And Rebekah got to be a Pastor (quick, hide from Sarah Beth or she'll be after your blood) for her audition when they modified it. And I did my audition as a valley girl because they told me to. I will have to do that again tomorrow to show SB and Ozon and the peoples because it was bloody amusing.

I think the craziest thing is realizing how much more confident I was now doing the audition than I was two years ago for Infanta. Back then I was all nervous and scared and unable to remember my monologue and I really didn't see myself getting to callbacks, let alone getting a part; and yet there I was, Carlos the Count of Tierra Nueva. Fuck that play was amusing, it was so horrible, and everybody did such a great job, with the angry Don Pedro and the immobile pages and the Dwarf and the special guest appearance by Mrs. Mckeown as the flaming, dancing imp. It was all so magical. Doing that play made me feel like an actor.

And now I'm still feeling the after effects of that, I still feel like an actor, and now I don't have issues with being nervous (didn't really last year for The Tutor either, too bad Rebekah and Kiora didn't see that, although that's mostly my fault). And apparently Lauren was nervous for her monologue and SB gawked when somebody mentioned that she thought it got easier with experience. And yet with very little experience I feel like I'm a theatre person. I've rambled for a while now. In conclusion, valley girl acting is funny as hell.

P-I-E

Oh look, I haven't posted anything in a few weeks. I should be shot. *attempts to load gun* Aghnarr. *fails to load gun* jesus-raping *loads gun and shoots self in foot* FUCK! I something to do other than shoot myself in the foot and bleed, it's not terribly fun. Maybe it is actually. Hmm, blood tastes like iron, doesn't it? Hmm, I dunno what I'm saying.
I need pie, we have pie at home, but I'm at my dad's where we don't have pie. Stupif pir lacker, and stupid physics questions that don't make sense and all the units work out but the goddam numbers don't because the universe hates me and crushes my intestines with giant boots while I try to avoid them. Speedy boots, oh dear, that rhymes with bandicoot!
I'm just rambling incoherently right now, so I'll shut up and watch tv.

The End is NIGH (um... again)

That's right, two (or maybe three) months ago I was here complaining about the end of school, and now I'm back to complain about the end of summer. Actually to be perfectly honest I'm glad school is starting again, I'm so agonizingly unproductive during the summer. I didn't do a single piece of work on any of my stories or plays pretty much all summer. I really don't think I'm much of a writer, or rather I think I'm writing the wrong thing. You know how you always hear those important folkies that know things and are so full of wisdom you think they might explode and shower you in it causing your skin to boil wherever it makes contact because of a supreme lack of wisdom within yourself always say "Write what you know" ? Well I've heard that, and I've always thought "well that's a good idea, nice and logical and all that" and then I promptly ignore it because apparently I know better than the exploding wisdom beings. Because I never ever write what I know. I always write precisely what I don't know. I suppose you understand the flaw in this system, basically everything I write is a bunch of made up BS with no foundation in the real world. Even the topics close to me are completely foreign to me. Pretty much the only thing I know anything at all about is being part of my fucked up family.

It sometimes seems like everybody's families are perfect and your family are a bunch of outcast freaks. And then other times you see someone else's family and they almost seem as bad as your own and you think your family is somewhat normal? I can't remember where that was going, I started this post yesterday and had my thoughts interupted when somebody stole the computer for some reason or another.

So I just watched Kissing Jessica Stein, which I've now seen 4 times, and it is still a most excellent movie. The weird thing is this time I was sitting there trying to gauge how my sister felt about homosexuality (the movie is about lesbians (okay not about lesbians in general but two of the main characters are (sort of (are nested brackety things bad?)))) and still being annoyed at myself for not telling anybody in my family and thinking "well now's a time I could reveal it by saying ". Why am I saying this? Well I don't know, maybe because I know nobody in my family will ever read this and thus find out about me being gay, partially. And maybe because I need to vent some of this crap and if I say it directly to the only person who's online that I might say it to well then that would be talking about my emotions with her and then she would be right, which I will not allow.

Alright, so I'm an asshole. We all knew it, we've all said it. Moving on. I have nothing further to type, so I'll just post this now and hope I'm right about my family not ever reading this.